The Ministry of Tears
“My tears have been my food day and night” (Ps. 42:2).
For most of us, the last few years have offered more than a few occasions to grieve. Many a Thanksgiving table will include an empty chair. As I type, I have four—four—friends in the throes of cancer. Two of them anxiously await scan results. All of them plead for a miracle.
The other night, I finally gave in to the sobs that had been lurking underneath the lump in my throat and had a good cry. Afterward, I felt better.
Scientists estimate that our planet hosts approximately 15 million species,[1] but God reserved the gift of tears for his image-bearers. Professor Ad Vingerhoets, a Dutch scholar, researched human grief and said, “In the sense of producing emotional tears, we are the only species. All mammals make distress calls, like when an offspring is separated from its mother, but only humans cry.”[2]
God wired us to grieve. In fact, he ministers to us through the grieving process. While the act of crying perplexed Darwin, many scientists today believe the body cleanses itself of toxic stress chemicals through weeping.[3] Researchers looked at two different kinds of tears, reflexive (think chopped onions) and emotion-driven. Water made up ninety-eight percent of the onion tears, but “sad” tears contained two chemicals associated with stress. Interestingly, our grief tears also include leucine-enkephalin, an endorphin with a natural pain-reducer-mood-increaser function.[4] We are, as David wrote, “Fearfully and wonderfully made” (Ps. 139:14).
Lamenting is a part of life. Jesus himself, when he approached his dead friend’s tomb, wept (Jn. 11:35). Jesus demonstrated what Paul would later encourage us to do when he said, “Weep with those who weep” (Rom. 12:15).
We do our friends and our family no favors when we race to put an end to their grief. We minister well when we enter their sadness and mourn with them.
[1] This number is an estimate, according to Science Daily. There are 2.12 million categorized, or known, species as of 2020. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2020/07/200701100030.htm
[2] Amanda Smith, Why Are Humans the Only Animals to Cry? ABC.net/au. July 23, 2013. Visited on November 23, 2021. https://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/archived/bodysphere/features/4837824
[3] https://theswaddle.com/why-do-we-feel-so-tired-after-a-good-cry/. See also https://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/emotions/crying.htm.
[4] https://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/emotions/crying.htm.